Settling in

It's hard to believe that I have been at my new place for a week now. This blog post will be more of a newsy update I think than a reflection. But then again - it may morph into something that resembles a reflection. I usually sit down to write with some idea in my head of what this post would look like, and often it takes me down a different road.

Moving went well. I am grateful to all who helped. I could not have done this without you. Today I am trying to organize the kitchen in a way that makes sense and adding my dishes and food contributions. If you saw my kitchen at home, you'd be surprised to learn that it is driving me CRAZY that the kitchen isn't organized the way I like it. I suppose I am a bit of a control freak. Everyone is out of the house today and I'm trying to take advantage of it and get as many boxes unpacked as possible.

My first night here was strange. I was alone in this very big house. I guess I had grandeous ideas of what my first night would look like, that there would be a celebration of welcome, surrounded by new friends. I think I had high hopes that I would never feel alone again. I realized though that I need to be comfortable with aloneness and solitude for community to work. There will be many times (like today) when I find myself home alone and need to occupy my time.

The next day I jammed with the musicians to practice for the worship service (we made a great team) and helped lead worship. Afterwards, several people came over for dinner and there was laughter and stories around the table. I remember sitting there thinking "THIS is why I came here, this is what I've been longing for and feel called to".

Thursday I went to the local nursinghome where we have partnered and led a hymnsing. It is hard to play hymns using chord charts! And on top of that to lead the singing. I stumbled along and some were grateful and others complained. I thrive on encouragement. And criticism, whether true or not, can bring me down so far. I got thinking after the hymn sing that this is an area of my life that I need to work on - I need to find my identity in Christ and be secure in that. Serving is not about getting compliments, it is about Christ and loving others. True love does not need a response from the other.

Thursday night I made a caribbean chili with thyme, cumin, nutmeg, cinnamon and all spice. As I was preparing the food, people kept streaming in and I think we fed 10 people! Maybe that was the highlight of my week - cooking and doing what I love most, and having people enjoy the fruits of my labours.

Shalom is not settling in so easily. He has been depressed, not eating much of his food, and until recently has spent most of his time on my bed. It's all new for him. He is not used to so many people. Or the sounds of the trucks going by the street. Every sound puts him on edge. I've been giving him lots of attention. Thursday though was particularly traumatic for him (and for me). People were moving out, people were moving in. It was chaos. So Shalom was in my room while my roommate brought her stuff in. She was vaccuuming and this totally freaked shalom out. I picked Shalom up to comfort him, and he took a giant swat at my face giving me a nice deep laceration. One of the house members took me to emergency and I got 9 stitches, a tetanus shot, antibiotics and painkillers. My face looks pretty dreadful at the moment with various shades of blue and purple. I'm seeing a plastic surgeon on Tuesday at the hospital to see if there is anything thing they can do as the emergency doctor warned me the scar is going to be pretty bad. Thank goodness Shalom missed my eye by less than a centimeter!

My doctor wants me to take more time and go on disability. So I am taking the fall to work more on healing and to serve. I have a few ideas of what I want to do. Plus it feels good to be available to help people as needs come up. I'm excited to see what learning, healing and growth comes through the fall.